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信仰的力量源自與主同行

January 29, 2026
in Chinese, Local, Untold Story of the Living Faith in Sabah
Michael黃士南

Michael黃士南出生於1961年,是一名典型的「搖籃教友」。他形容自己從小到大,習慣跟着家人進出教堂,卻搞不清自己與信仰的關係。信仰並不是一個被鄭重作出的決定,更像是在家庭與成長過程中,一路被帶著走,也一路慢慢摸索的事情。

這份信仰的起點,來自他的母親。她並不擅言辭,也說不出系統的神學道理,卻用一生的堅持,為孩子立下最深刻的榜樣。這種安靜而持久的信德,後來成為黃士南信仰中最深的一道底色。

然而,童年時期的教會,對他而言並不總是溫暖親切的空間。那是一個拉丁文與英文禮儀佔主導的年代。對受中文教育的孩子來說,彌撒往往像一場必須出席、卻難以理解的儀式。他回憶,那時的自己常是心不在焉。

直到十四歲,他才正式進入要理班,當時他還未初領聖體,相較同班的同學(一般是十歲),他來得稍晚,也讓他多了一份旁觀與思考的距離。他回憶,當時自己站起來幾乎比老師還高。那也是一個中文牧靈資源相對稀少的年代。對許多華語背景的教友來說,信仰在有限的理解中慢慢摸索。

真正的轉變,並不只發生在要理課堂上,而是伴隨著整個堂區的轉變而來–隨著李奕瑤主教、岑選青神父、董前智神父以及季書章神父等通曉華語的神父的到來,中文彌撒與華文牧靈逐步設立。對許多華語教友而言,這不僅是語言的改變,更像是一扇門被打開了。當天主的聖言能夠被聽懂,信仰也開始與生命產生連結。

在此過程中,黃士南從旁觀者,逐漸成為參與者。起初,只是被邀請參與教會禮儀歌唱、讀經,協助禮儀上的需要;後來,參與的範圍越來越廣。從歌詠團、禮儀組,到青年團、聖經分享小組、要理與慕道培育,他一步步走進堂區的核心服務。

回過頭看,他才意識到,自己已在教會裡走過了三、四十年的歲月。年輕時的服務,帶著充沛的熱情,也夾雜著幾分年少意氣與成就感。站在臺前領經、帶領歌詠、被教友需要與看見,本身就是一種推動力。直到後來,他才逐漸意識到,這份熱心之中,也曾摻雜著對角色與表現的執著,而歲月將這些慢慢沉澱為責任的過程。

談起自己的服事經歷,黃士南從不以成就自居。他是華文協調委員會的創始成員之一,三十多年後又再次承擔起帶領的責任;他在慕道與要理培育中投入超過三十年,如今不少堂區的要理老師,正是他當年的學生。他說,那不是自己的本領,而是因為在那個年代,人手有限,總需要有人願意站出來。

人生並非一帆風順。一場嚴重的意外,讓他雙腿骨折,臥床近兩個月,生活一度完全失去自理能力。那段日子,對他而言,是身體與信仰同時被迫停下來的時刻。他內心深處感到困惑不解,反覆思索自己多年來的付出,與所承受的痛苦之間的關係。

在病榻旁,季神父曾握著他的手,對他說:“我知道你很辛苦,但若你願意和耶穌一起度過四旬期,祂與你同在。”這句話,後來成為他在病中重要的支撐。躺在病床上,連最基本的生活都需要祈禱與交託,也正是在那樣的脆弱中,他體會到人不是在最有能力的時候,才與天主親近。

這場病痛,成爲他信仰的重要轉折點。他開始反思自己多年來的服事方式:是否過於執着成果與掌控,是否在不知不覺中,把「爲教會做事」放在了「與天主建立關係」之前。

隨着年歲增長,黃士南對教會的觀察也愈發清醒。教友老化、青年參與下降、家庭信仰傳承出現斷層,是他反覆思考的課題。但他不把問題簡單化,歸咎於年輕人,而認為這與整個家庭結構與社會節奏的改變,息息相關。

在資訊爆炸、科技高度介入生活的時代,人們習慣快速獲得答案,卻越來越少靜下心來祈禱與反思。他始終認為,真正能觸及人心的,並不是更多的活動或訊息,而是人與人之間真實的陪伴、信任與榜樣,尤其離不開家庭的參與。

因此,在參與教會禮儀服務與信仰培育的同時,他也投入建立關懷性的團體,如定期為年長教友組織聚會,讓他們在教會中感受到被記得、被需要。他常說,自己能做的或許不多,但只要教會需要,他仍願意付出。

回顧自己的信仰旅程,黃士南坦言,最大的低潮並非來自外在困難,而是面對教會現實處境時的無力感。但他學會把目光從指責他人,轉向省察自己,並一次又一次回到初心。

在訪談的尾聲,他用一句話概括自己多年的體會:信仰並不是一時的熱心,而需要用一生去學習、不斷調整態度、努力活出基督的人生道路。

從他的生命軌跡中,人們得以看見:教會的力量,往往不是來自巨大的口號,而是來自那些願意在歲月中同行、在平凡中守候基督的人。

 

(CC)

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信仰的力量源自與主同行

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