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Lord, make me your instrument

March 1, 2021
in Nation
Lord, make me your instrument

Rev Deacon Bonaventure Rayappan

By Gwen Manickam

Mar 1 2021

On Feb 27, 2021, two priestly ordinations were held, one in the Archdiocese of Kuala Lumpur and the other in the Diocese of Keningau. Here is the vocation story of Deacon Bonaventure Rayappan OFM Cap.

Rev Deacon Bonaventure Rayappan was ordained as a diocesan priest on Saturday, Feb 27 2021, by Archbishop Julian Leow, at his home parish, Our Lady of Lourdes (OLL), Klang.

Six months ago, on Aug 6, 2020, amidst a brief easing in the Movement Control Order (MCO), the 34-year-old was ordained a transitional deacon at the Church of St Francis Xavier, Petaling Jaya. Upon completing his seminary studies at College General, Penang, at the onset of the pandemic, Deacon Bonaventure was assigned to OLL to help prepare for his priestly ordination. 

“I am so happy to be in my home parish. The hardest part about the MCO is not meeting parishioners in person.

“As a deacon I officiated at nuptial blessings, visited the homebound and administered Holy Eucharist to those in need. That aside, I have only met parishioners online. After my Sacerdotal Ordination I will be able to administer more sacraments like holy anointing and confession, so SOP permitting, I hope to meet more parishioners,” said Deacon Bona.

He was supposed to have been ordained as a priest on Jan 28, 2021. However, when the government issued another MCO and limited the Church’s in-person capacity to five people, he asked Most Rev Leow if it could be postponed and he agreed. The youngest of three children, Deacon Bona said he was raised as a chinna raja (little prince). “I am very grateful that my parents gave me a beautiful childhood. I only  realised how much I appreciated my family when I was 22, and my newlywed sister was leaving for her new home. I started crying and could not stop myself. Those around me, including my sister, were surprised as most did not think we were that close. “

My brother, who is six years older, and I did not grow up together. Only after he got married and I joined the seminary, did we grow closer and now share a great bond.”

Although the Deacon grew up pampered and only learnt to do chores when he joined the working world, his mother did not spare the rod. “Amma treated all three of us equally. For me receiving a belting from Amma was a daily occurrence, like when I opened the cover of the running thosai grinder and wet flour splattered all over the kitchen. I am sure there were many other tools and utensils,” said Deacon Bona, remembering her fondly.

His mother, who passed away in 2016 from heart failure, was his beacon of spiritual guidance. “Amma rarely missed Sunday Mass. Even when her leg was amputated, she made an effort to go for Mass. The Eucharist was her spiritual food for all situations and the summit of her life.”

Because of his mother’s strong faith, Deacon Bona’s formative years were spent actively serving in the church. “Until I was 12, I always admired the role of priests in our church and I aspired to be one. When asked what my ambition was during my Standard Six tuition class, I quickly replied ‘Father’. As the class was full of Tamil speaking nonChristians, they all burst out laughing think ing I wanted to have children. It took a while to clarify what I meant.”

After Confirmation, God, church, faith, and religion took a back seat in Deacon Bona’s life. “Church was touch and go for me. My focus was to earn a lot of money, have girlfriends, buy the right house, favourite car and get married. I wanted to enjoy the worldly things like my friends, and I did.”

Some 13 years ago, amidst living his best life, a profound incident occurred, (which he doesn’t wish to detail) and it rocked Deacon Bona’s world as he knew it.

“I suddenly found that all the money I was chasing still left me feeling empty.”

Since the church played an important role in his younger days, he went back and this time, sat inside. “I felt a peace come over me. I realised, when God calls you, it is hard to run away. He knows how to bring you back.”

At that point, he regretted his past actions, but now, in hindsight, feels he needed to experience that side of life to help understand his vocation and his flock better.

His journey through the seminary was not  easy either. His parents were sceptical at first, as there was no one to support the family and take over his dad’s business.

“I did not want to seem like I was running away from my responsibilities. So, I prayed that God would clear the path for me to join the Seminary and, in His time, He did.

“God works wonders and miracles in our lives. We just need to believe he will,” said Deacon Bona.

Language was his next hurdle. Born and bred in Klang, Deacon Bona’s first language is Tamil. “I went to a Tamil primary school and then SMK La Salle, Klang, where my friends were also Tamil-speaking. It took me three attempts on the IELTS exam (International English Language Testing System) to get the required 6.5 points to join the seminary.” In that too he saw God’s miraculous hands working.

At the seminary, Deacon Bona also learned that a vocation evolves and is everchanging.

“As I matured in my journey, I found my vocation being purified and fine-tuned. From wanting to do God’s will at the beginning of my vocation, I now want to be an instrument of God.” “Although God created us, and like any inventor, wants to see us reach our full and best potential, He loves us enough to let us freely choose our path. Likewise, who am I to try and control others?”

At the seminary, he learnt an important lesson: it’s not how many times we fall but that we repent and go back to God. “This has had a huge impact on my growth as a human being – a reminder that even if we fall or fail, we have another chance to do better.”

On his ministry as a priest, Deacon Bona said, “I leave that in God’s hands. As a priest, I aim to serve God with all my strength, weakness and limitations.” – Herald Malaysia

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