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Gilbert James OFMCap: Vocation is my loving response to God’s love

February 17, 2021
in Local
Gilbert James OFMCap: Vocation is my loving response to God’s love

Friar Gilbert James OFMCap

By Agnes Chai

Feb 17 2021

GILBERT James is the second son of Sabah soil to embrace the way of life of St Francis in the Capuchin Order, the first being Fr Valentine Gompok of Tambunan in 2003.

Vocational discernment often begins with listening to God, gaining clarity and taking the next best step closest to the call. For Gilbert, it was no different. In his discernment journey, he explored several Religious Orders/Society, as well as the diocesan priesthood.

But as God would have it, he discovered that to be a son of St Francis of Assisi was the way for him to best answer God’s call to the priestly vocation – to live among a band of brothers in simplicity of life and radical poverty, and being deeply in love with God.

On the eve of his priestly ordination, Gilbert shares his thoughts with Catholic Sabah as he recalls his vocation journey and in seeing how God cares for him and his family through it all.

“Life was hard (growing up with his father, James Augustin Janggul in Papar) but looking back, I feel God must have cared for me and my family all throughout. That is why for my ordination I chose the theme “Caritas Christi Urget Nos…..The Love of Christ urges us on….(2 Cor 5:14)” This verse from the second Letter of St Paul to the Corinthians aptly describes not only my journey to answer His call, but my journey in life,. My whole life is a testimony of Christ’s love for me, and my vocation is my loving response to His love.”    

Gilbert will be ordained by Keningau Bishop Cornelius Piong on Feb 27 at St Theresa Church Tambunan, the home place of his mother, Anna bte Yakil. Though he grew up in Papar, his first formative years were shaped by his mother who lives in Tambunan. Thus the choice of place for his ordination is a tribute to his mother.

His mother’s influence continues unabated for “one among her sons” who aspires this most noble call to the priesthood. “All through my formation years, I believe, the prayers of my mother helped me through. And I am forever grateful for that,” underscores the priestly candidate.

The consolation of his mother somehow diminishes the lack of support from a father, who follows the way of tradition that the eldest, on becoming a wage-earner, is expected to take care of them in their old days.

He recalled “I felt consoled when my mother was very happy and even cried when I told her about my decision. She said that when we were still very young, she has prayed that God would choose one of her sons. I am the eldest and I know I should be the one to take care of them. But even now, I still believe I can take care of them, not materially, but spiritually, by offering my prayers and little sacrifices for them.”

Gilbert graduated as a civil and environmental engineer, and it was understandable for his father to look towards harvesting from there.  What then made him leave the lucrative job and join a seminary?

“It was not an easy decision but I believe that God has called me in a special way to love and serve Him and His people. I realized His love is so great for me that I feel I need to respond to Him faithfully,” he recollected.

The rest of the interview

CS: At the time of decision, the Order of Friars Minor Capuchin has not yet established a presence in Sabah. What attracted you to the Capuchins?

GJ: A Franciscan sister, the late Sr Diana Eng FSIC, introduced me to St Francis of Assisi, but initially she encouraged me to attend the vocation seminar held in Bundu Tuhan. I also went to a few others conducted by other religious orders, and was eventually convinced that God wanted me to be after the St Francis’ way of life.

Sr Diana introduced me to a group of aspirants called Franciscan Boys under the guidance of Sr Frances Mani FSIC (now Mother General of FSIC). This group is open to all kinds of vocations, not specifically for the Franciscan vocation.

Why Capuchins? I was attracted to their simplicity and fraternity (brotherhood). “Be a brother to all” the Capuchins say, and we know that St Francis was living this mantra all through his life because, as he says, we all came from the same Father.

Moreover, it reminds me of my initial attraction to the Capuchin habit, which I saw when I was studying in the university. At that time I thought the priest I went to for confession must be a Carmelite. I thought I would like to be counted among them. As I came to know more of the Capuchin Order, I felt this is where I wanted to be. This is where I could be a son of St Francis. This is where I felt God is calling me. 

 CS: How did you hear your call to vocation?

 GJ: I have these questions as I grew up: Who is God? How does he look like? Why did I exist at all for I have nothing to give?

These questions would always play in my mind whenever I was alone. There is a desire for me to know God. But I was very shy to ask anyone. My curiosity led me to read the Bible, but at the primary schooler age, I didn’t understand. I was searching for something more.

When I started secondary school in SM St Mary, Limbahau, Papar, I missed my mother a lot, as she stayed in Tambunan because my other siblings were attending primary school there. So I prayed a lot more, using the rosary guide in Kadazan. Imagine, I was only using my fingers to count the Hail Marys because I did not have rosary beads.

Something happened to me when I was in Form 2. I was praying the rosary as usual after dinner when I suddenly heard clearly the voice of the brother-in-law of my cousin.

They were having a party at my aunt’s house, about 60m from our house. My tears fell profusely. I felt rather strange so I stopped praying. It puzzled me because; although my tears do fall every time I pray the rosary, but that night it was falling profusely. I prayed “Mother Mary, what is the meaning of this?”

After my tears subsided, I continued praying. Early the next morning I was surprised to learn that the in laws of my cousin met with an accident and that the brother-in-law of my cousin died. Immediately I remembered the incident of the previous night. I was thinking, maybe I should have prayed for him that night.

Was it a sign from God that I need to pray more for people? But this did not sink deep in me until my second year at university. What really touched the core of my being was during a Mass in Holy Rosary Church Limbahau in 2005.

I sensed that God spoke to me directly through the lyrics of the Communion song that day, Bersatu dengan Tuhan dalam Ekaristi – renung firman di alkitab, renung sekelilingmu, apakah sumbanganmu, sebagai umat Ekaristi (Be united with God in the Eucharist – Reflect on His Word, reflect around you; what can you contribute as a Eucharistic faithful). I have achieved something I wanted in my life, but now what is that the one thing that God wants me to do.

These are the events in my life through which I felt that God made His invitation to me to follow Him.

CS: How long did it take you to reach this stage, i.e. to be a religious priest?

 GJ: Embracing a religious life is not easy. There are many stages of formation that we go through. The first stage is what we call Aspirancy, which in my case, was done outside when I was still working. This is the initial contact with the Order. After passing the interview and other requirements, I proceeded to Postulancy for two years.

After Postulancy, I went to the Novitiate in the Philippines for one year. This is a period of intense prayer and community living with limited contact with the outside world. After novitiate, I professed a simple vow of obedience, poverty and chastity, and was assigned to a fraternity in our retreat centre in Lipa City, Philippines for one year. Here, I was introduced to the retreat, giving and managing a retreat centre.

Next, I was sent to Mindanao, particularly in General Santos City for one year. While there, I was sent with others to our mission stations deep in the interior of Davao Occidental. The focus was immersion with the poor, inter-religious dialogue and immersion with the indigenous people. After a year over there I returned to Malaysia to prepare for my perpetual profession.

I made my perpetual profession on 1 May 2013 in Sacred Heart Cathedral, Kota Kinabalu, followed by a two-year study on philosophy at the University of Santo Tomas, Manila. The next four years were taken up by theological studies at Divine Word Seminary, Tagaytay City. Hence, all in all, it took me 13 formative years before I was ordained as a deacon.  In spite of this pandemic, I will finally be ordained after a few postponements. 

CS: Tell us more about your childhood and family life.

 GJ: I grew up in a poor family. I am the eldest of five siblings. Although life is hard, I did have a happy childhood. Life in the kampung (village) revolves around planting rice, hill rice or padi bukit. I have always wondered if rain should stop during planting season or that there are pests attacking the rice, it would surely have led us to experience famine.

God must be really helping us because we did not starve. There must be a God who is so good, but whom I do not know. Though we are Catholics by birth, I do not know God well. So many questions I had about God and about life. So early in life I realized that knowledge is very important.

I had my primary education in SK Monsok Tengah Tambunan, the school in the neighbouring kampung as there is no school in ours. We need to walk around 6 km to school. For my secondary school, I need to live in my paternal grandmother’s house in Kg Papaga Papar, which was nearer to the house compared to any other school in Tambunan. The school in Papar was fine, but I remembered that I was extremely shy.

I also recalled that I was lazy to go to church for Mass, and my father has to wake me up every Sunday so that I would not miss Mass, although he rarely went himself. But I prayed the rosary faithfully as I felt that I could connect with the Blessed Virgin Mary more comfortably.

CS: Your ordination is taking place in an unprecedented time when the coronavirus plays havoc with life, socially, economically and culturally. What are your immediate pastoral priorities in the light of the pandemic crisis?

GJ: Indeed, our world is in a very difficult situation. We hear people being laid off; many farmers cannot sell their produce; families cannot meet as before; even our liturgical life also face challenges, which requires new way of doing our ministries. We see churches utilizing social media especially to reach their parishioners by way of online Masses, meetings and so on.

Realizing these situations, I believe I have a role to bring hope, love and care, and to let people see that definitely goodness will triumph, that God will make all things new again. How? With the limited movement, the best possible way to reach people is through social media. In fact, recently some friends shared their struggles in life and I believe listening to them has somehow lightened their burdens.

CS: The uncertainties of the pandemic present challenges to evangelization. How does it shape and impact the lives of priests, the faithful, and the Church?

GJ: The movement control order and other restrictions really challenge the Church to think of how to minister to her people and how to carry out her duty to spread the Word of God. I believe this pandemic makes the Church realized all the more that a new mode of evangelization is needed, one that can be applied to situations such as these. For example, some method or mode needs to be improved or adjusted so that the limitation of time and space can be reduced.

For the Church ministers who are the priests and religious, they need to be open to new ways to reach to the people in the best way possible

On the part of the faithful, they are to be encouraged to engage in prayer and to reading of spiritual books or articles in order to nourish and strengthen their spiritual life.

Finally, we must cultivate an openness to the Spirit of God, and above all, not losing our faith and hope in God.

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